The only solace I am ever going to find is when they have children of their own. I've wished 10 boys upon Jennifer and 5 girls just like her upon Cassidi. I look so forward to the day when they are pulling their hair out in trying to raise their children. I will turn a deaf ear, you can believe that. And that will most likely be literally, since I firmly believe they are both going to spite me and NEVER give me grandchildren.
Just when I think I'm making progress, there is another stumble. It's not the stumbling that I mind so much. It's the repeated stumbles over the same dead log in the road. Use a damn chainsaw to cut through it or pick a different path! It's pretty simple, but for some reason impossible to achieve.
I know my parents had to have had these same thoughts. Gosh knows with the auspicious start I had, they thought much worse. I was far from perfect (and still am for that matter). Relatively speaking, I know the girls are much better off than their peers. But dang it's frustrating using the sorry standards of society today as the measuring tool.
I know I'm in the same boat as many parents. It's good to know I'm not alone at times. Sometimes I feel like I've done a lousy job as a parent, and others not as much. I am very proud of so many things the girls have accomplished. But there are a few hard headed traits that they have that I'd like to beat out of them. I have no idea where they get their stubborn streak :)
Even though they frustrate me to a boiling point over and over, I still love them and am grateful they are in my life. My Mom always told me you are never done raising your children, no matter how old they are. I'm starting to understand what she meant. I know she's smiling down on my parenting woes getting the last laugh from her own challenging children wishes upon me. I guess I'm getting exactly what I deserve.
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