Goals

My type A personality keeps me focused on goals non stop. I try to live life day by day, but I still find myself setting goals and marching toward them. I think the difference these days is that I'm not so maniacal about having to fulfill them to the nth degree.

My word project has been fairly successful. I have only missed a handful of days excluding the long span when Eleanor died. Some nights I just don't feel like I have anything useful to say. Other times I feel like I could write a book. It must be difficult to be an author.

As my empty nest approaches, my mind is racing with all the activities I want to pursue. I haven't put pencil to paper (or in the electronic world I live in, typing to notepad) as yet on all those ideas. There are still a few unknowns brewing in our household, so I'm holding out for now. But the day will come, and I'll be off to the races in pursuing them.

As with everything, there is a balance. Being goal oriented isn't bad. I have achieved a lot in life by being driven. But goodness knows I've gone overboard on more than one occasion. Chewable chunks versus the whole enchilada. Drinking from the water fountain versus the fire hydrant. These are concepts I speak of often, but am more than slow to honor.

I like to think I'm a work in progress. If I were perfect, that would be very boring! Knowing my weaknesses, admitting to them, and then figuring out how to work on them is what makes life interesting!

Female

I consider myself a strong female, not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually. I've had a few knock downs in my life, but nothing that ever kept me down for long. I'm a firm believer of the saying "that which does not kill us only makes us stronger".

Tonight I read an article about the sex mobs that are being used in Egypt to silence women protesters.  Political parties are sending men to areas specifically to alienate a woman from her group of friends. They are even paying bystanders to join in on the rape. It is disgusting.

It makes me appreciate the freedoms we are afforded in this nation. So many people whine about their rights being infringed upon and the various things being done to them causing them to be victims. I highly doubt many of them are experiencing the brutality that those in Egypt are facing right now.

The next time I go to complain about something, I am going to remind myself of these despicable practices in other countries. I am going to cherish my freedom of speech without persecution. I am going to cherish my freedom to pursuit of happiness. I am going to remember all those that came before me that truly were victims that suffered dire consequences so I could have these freedoms.

Roller coasters

The highs and lows of life come at varying speeds. Today my emotions have run the gamut. I keep reminding myself that this is the second child we've sent to college. We survived the first, and we will survive the second.

The grounds of UVA are beautiful. The weather also was a roller coaster today. We started out with beautiful sunshine to end with a torrential downpour. But it gave us many viewpoints of the life Cass will lead here.

I picked up bits and pieces of information along the way. The speakers today were all very educated, but incredibly personable. UVA is the Ivy League of the South, and we worried it might be a little too "stiff" for Cass. But from what I saw today, I think she will be just fine. I hope she feels the same.

The first person that spoke to her told her she liked her accent. It is something she will have to get used to hearing as there are students here from all over the globe. An accent won't hold her back, but a bad attitude about it will! She likes to entertain, so she needs to milk it for all the laughs she can get. And then she can laugh all the way to the bank when they misjudge her as stupid and she eats their breakfast, lunch, and dinner academically!

I got a little grumpy today with disrespectful and rude parents. It truly amazes me that anyone thinks it is acceptable to have a full on conversation in an auditorium when someone is speaking. I wanted to shout "Hey moron, this isn't about YOU! Please go outside if you don't have the decency to sit quietly and show respect for the person in front of you that is educated and sharing valuable information about the well being of your child." I did glare, but didn't speak. Had I had Tony in tow, the outcome might have been different.

Tomorrow is another day of information and networking. I requested a FaceTime chat tonight, but she still hasn't called. I don't know if she's in overload mode or enjoying herself. I hope it's the latter. Nonetheless, I'm tired and ready to be home. This roller coaster ride hopefully is in park for the night so I can get some much needed rest.

Orientation

We're at Cass' orientation to UVA.  Last summer we visited the campus and took a tour. Tonight we drove around to find out where we need to be tomorrow. At first it seemed a little confusing, but after a few complete circles, we got the hang of it.

We passed by the hospital where Eleanor spent so much time for four years, including her final days. I feeling of great sadness came over me. But I know she is in a better place and is resting peacefully. I know she would be so excited to hear about Cass' adventures here at UVA. She'll be watching over her and protecting her in her journeys.

It hasn't hit me yet that she'll be leaving in about 6 weeks. Right now it's just a big adventure. Maybe tomorrow will make it a little more real. But then again, if I focus on the fun and excitement, maybe I won't be so sad. It's just another phase of life I need to embrace and enjoy.

Miller

On the way home the night of July 4th we were driving up Riverside Drive in Mount Airy. Right off the side of the road, we saw an animal. I thought it looked like a baby deer. We went back and sure enough, I was right.

He was the tiniest thing. It looked like he must have just come out of a driveway to a recycling center. Tony got out of the car and he came right to him. He picked him up and tried to take him back down that road. He followed Tony right back out. He made a noise that sounded very similar to a cow mewing. It was pitiful.

Knowing he would go right back out in the road, we decided to take him home for the night. We got some baby formula to feed him and had a large dog kennel to keep him safe. Cassidi decided his name should be Miller. She got up every three hours to feed him.

The next morning we decided it was best to take him back to look for his Momma. We left him there all day. On my way home from work, I stopped to see if he was still there. Unfortunately, he was. As soon as I got close while calling his name and he saw me, he came bounding out.

Figuring our human scent had detered his Momma, we had no choice but to take him back home. We figured that the fireworks had scared his Momma off to begin with. But who really knows what happened. All we knew is that we couldn't just abandon him.

We got goats milk for him and tried to do all the things web sites instructed us to do. He seemed to do okay, but then I noticed some places on his legs. The further we looked, it appeared he had numerous open wounds. He slowly became less interested in eating and became weaker and weaker. It was heart breaking.

Today we finally called the vet see if they could help. They said they would take him and put him in the hands of a wildlife rehabilitator. They were going to treat his wounds and give him some fluids.  He can't be more than a few days old. We can only hope they'll nurse him back to health. We hope we did the right things to help him. The last hope is that he can one day return to the wild and live a long life.

Nests

It looks like my nest is going to be a little more empty than I expected. While Cass is leaving for college this fall and we fully expected that, it looks like Tony will be headed to Europe after all. It will be very interesting to see how all of this is going to pan out. I'm definitely a hermit, but this much alone time might be more than I bargained for.

Hope

Hope is a wonderful word. It encompasses so many things to each individual. For me it is the dawning of a new day. It is the dreams of tomorrow. It is a tiny word of only four letters and one syllable. But all of its wonder could not fit into the largest of containers. There is no greater phrase than I hope...