Nothing

Tonight I'm taking my Mom's advice (and Thumper's). When you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

Complacency

We all get caught up in the monotony of our day to day life, no matter what the age. We get to the point where we take what we have for granted. It's just another one of the many flaws of being human.

With this being Cass' senior year, I've tried and tried to impress upon her the need to enjoy every last second. It's so easy to get to the point of being sick of school work, teachers, fellow classmates, and sports. Sometimes when we know there is a definite end to one thing and the beginning of another, it's hard not to wish time away.

Some of us have had the scare of not having a tomorrow or have a loved one that has. It makes us stop in our tracks and appreciate the here and now. The hum drum life takes on new meaning and we can find joy in the little things again.

Blessings can be found in any situation. Some of them are more difficult to see than others. But many times it's all in your perspective. Don't allow yourself to become complacent and jaded by this thing we call life. It's all part of the journey.

Prayer

As a kid, I used to pray for the silliest things. They seemed so important at the time. Let me get an A on a test. Let that boy like me. Let me win that 400m race. Me, me, ME!!! I didn't get old back then, because I didn't realize I was a self centered kid.

But as I've aged, my prayers have changed tremendously. Some of it has to do with maturity, but a lot of it has to do with understanding that sometimes God's plan is better than anything we could have imagined. It takes a lot of strength to let go and let God. He's slowly convinced me that he has it all under control.

As I've gotten older, those around me have too. Or they haven't. Death is something I have had to learn to cope with. When I was younger, very few people died around me. Some families have a lot of loss. Fortunately mine did not. But that meant I lived in somewhat of a fairy tale world for a long time. It meant I had to learn to integrate death in my life as an adult.

I still haven't had a tremendous amount of death in my life considering. But the few that I have lost has been painful. The most painful of course was my Mom. When you lose a parent, you lose a definition of yourself. I am no longer a daughter to my mother. That is a powerful connection.

When she first died, I remember being so angry that we didn't see the warning signs of her sickness. I still wanted her with us. But then I stopped to realize that if she had lived and has some sort of disability from the heart attack, she would have been miserable. I had to remember to not be selfish.

I have to be grateful that God followed the natural order of things and took her first. I don't think she would have survived the loss of any of her children or grand children. It was a small price to pay to mourn her so she could avoid that kind of pain.

And that's the way my prayers go now. I try to take the ME out of it. I don't have prayers that direct a specific outcome. Again, HIS plan is better than mine, and I just have to open my heart to it.

I pray that HE will wrap his loving arms around those that are in need of him - the sick, the injured, those in need for whatever reason. I pray for those family, friends, and loved ones trying to support those in need. And finally I pray for those that have lost someone or something that has left them lonely and in pain. I end with a thank you for all the blessings he has bestowed upon me and my loved ones. A simple prayer, but effective nonetheless.

We are all born. We all die. None of us make it out alive. I have seen the power of prayer create miracles as it seems God's will is the same of those praying for a specific outcome. I have seen the opposite. Whatever your prayer tonight, know that there is a God listening and wrapping his living arms around you.

Rejuvenation

Being a day spa owner, massage therapist, and yoga instructor I am always encouraging people to relax. Many times I don't practice what I preach. I know the value of taking care of myself, but fall victim to the same overwhelming responsibilities as my clients. My biggest challenge is saying "no".

I've been a mother hen my entire life. I don't know what dictates that, but if I see someone in need, I'm going to help them. I know it stems from my mom. She was always involved with her church and doing for others. I can remember helping at the nursing home when I was 11 or 12. Helping others is something you learn at a young age. I've tried to teach this same thing to my girls.

In doing for others, I often run my own well dry. The analogy I use is that we are all buckets of water. We give that water out to others along the way. And when we run out, we are no good to others, let alone ourselves. So finding ways to replenish that water is critical.

I have to find a better way to rejuvenate. I gave up teaching yoga this year, and I really miss it. Giving massage is a joy, but it does its part in running my physical well dry. I do receive massage, but most of the time it is focused on repairing the physical damage I'm doing to my body vs replenishing my spirit.

Sleep is a great passion of mine. When I can, I sleep in. But restful sleep is elusive these days. I tell all my clients about meditation. It really is so restorative. I must get back into the habit of it.

As this next week starts, I hope each of you will find your own avenues of rejuvenation. It doesn't matter what tool(s) you use to get there, just as long as you take the time out to pursue them. Namaste

Deflation

It's amazing how the energy in a situation can go from 110 watts to zero in a split second. Today during the game, the score was tied. There were 8.1 seconds left. We're all thinking we're headed to overtime. But in the blink of an eye, their player pulled up to shoot a 3 pointer, and it was nothing but net. Over, done, a loss. The entire place went silent except for our opponent's cheering section. Disheartening doesn't even begin to describe our response.

That type of situation is minor considering some of the other events that go on in life. One of our players from last year's team got a call her dad was in a serious car accident last night. Tony's mom got word her cancer is back last week and is already in the hospital doing treatments. I can remember the night my sister called to tell me my mom was gone. A silly basketball game's outcome pales in comparison to those type of events. 

It is a reminder that everything in life is relative and that we should never take anything for granted. Nothing is too small for us to appreciate. And at the same time, we have to learn to not let the small stuff totally deflate us. Actually, the goal is to take it all in stride - big stuff, small stuff, whatever comes our way. The best thing to do is to turn it over to God and pray. 

Empty

It's been a long week. We've had 3 games already and another one to go tomorrow. I would have really liked it if they could have spread the joy of basketball over more weeks. But I'm trying to take in as much as possible and enjoy it all. The spinning clock dial is making me dizzy.

Try as I might to come up with a good word tonight, I just can't. My gas tank is fast approaching empty. I'm grateful today is Friday, and I don't have to work tomorrow. I work most Saturdays, so it is a rare treat.

Maybe some rest will restore my word quest. I've really been enjoying it and it has made me much more aware of my thoughts.  The writing is therapeutic and something I've wanted to do for a long time.  But now is a time for some much needed rest. 

Contentment

I have always been a person that is forever in search of. The "of what" is always changing. I've never been one to drink from the water fountain, but more from the fire hose. I don't know what creates that in a person. If I did, there are plenty of times I would have turned it off.

There are some people in the world that can be born in a place and stay there forever in perfect contentment. Their life follows a routine day in and day out with very little variance. And they are happy and fulfilled. I wish I could be more like them.

I have varying degrees of contentment in my life. But the longevity of that state is what elludes me the most. I like being busy, learning new things, and seeing different places. I like to break the mold to see what's inside even if it isn't broken. This makes for a very interesting life, but sometimes it doesn't go quite as planned.

The other drawback is that I can unintentionally offend people along the way. If it's their thing I'm breaking (aka questioning), they don't always appreciate that. I want to try something a different way just to see if it will work and maybe improve it some along the way. That doesn't sit well with some folks, I've found.

I view most everything in life as a puzzle. I try to determine what all the pieces are and start putting it together. I don't wait on someone to tell me to do it or to get approval to do it. I just do it. And it doesn't usually take me very long to do all my deductive reasoning and get going. That also gets on a few people's nerves.

So while contentment is something I hope to achieve for long periods of time one of these days, it's something I usually disrupt on a regular basis for others. If you've been one of those people, I'm sorry. I usually don't do it on purpose and even more importantly don't do it with malice.