Pack Rat

I inherited it honestly. My Mom was a terrible pack rat. When she died, we helped Dad straighten things up. We carted off quite a bit of stuff that she had accumulated over the years. We found things that we knew exactly why she had kept them. But then we found things we had no idea why it was there.

Today I started the task of locating things to put in Cassidi's scrap books. In my search, I stumbled upon so many memories. I found funeral announcements of close friends, favorite pictures of the girls, and old love letters in addition to the things I was actually looking for.

This year for our anniversary Tony had gotten me a really cute card of a little boy and girl nose to nose. I told him he had gotten me that picture before, but he didn't believe me. Today I found the evidence. Ironically enough, it was last year's anniversary card. And funnier yet, I found another card with the same picture that was a Mother's Day card from him a while back. So, I told him from now on he had to get me that same card every year. Good thing it's adorable.

I was smiling and laughing as the years rolled passed my eyes. It was so good to reminisce. I did have moments where I got sad, but it was fleeting. And then it happened.

In the pile of cards that I have saved over the years, I found the Mother's Day card Eleanor sent me the year following her initial diagnosis. She had written a sweet note of appreciation for all of the things I had done to help her through the rough times she had faced. Seeing her writing was just as hard as reading the words. My euphoria gave way to sobs as I remembered all over again that's she's gone.

I am glad I keep all these tokens of time. They are wonderful reminders of the corners of my soul. Whether it is happy or sad memories that are evoked, they are part of me and part of life. I'll be a pack rat forever and proud of it!